Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of David and Ashley’s marriage. Trickling down slowly, that is. We rejoin the couple still fighting about David asking another woman out for drinks. David says he’s innocent, he merely wanted to discuss the depths of Ashley’s soul with one of her friends. Problem number one, this woman isn’t a friend of Ashley’s, and problem number two, getting “drinks” can seem inappropriate. If David had suggested “coffee” to this
troublemaker woman, it would have lessened the possibility of impropriety.
In a testimonial, Ashley claims David has ruined her dreams of a happily ever after, and I have to chuckle, don’t you? That Ashley, pretending she was really putting forth an effort for her dream. Ashley wanted someone else to pick her mate and everything fit into place in her perfect puzzle. David offers his daily apology, but this time, it won’t work. According to Ashley, this time he’s only sorry he was caught. Ashley storms off in a huff. David is still talking long after the door slams shut. He follows her into the kitchen and here is a summary of they said:
David: I’d never cheat.
Ashley: I don’t’ believe you.
David: Pretty please with sugar and spice and another nice house.
Ashely: Ugh, David. Thank you for giving me the out I’ve been dreaming of.
Over at Sam’s place where Neil is still just a guest because the two have not found a place of their own. They discuss mundane topics like tea and lunch. Sam asks Neil why he didn’t text her back and becomes whiny and irritated about it, so this obviously means Sam must be falling for Neil. Because she cares enough to nag. Sam also shares that Neil is definitely growing on her because at first his bug-eyes really bothered her, now, not so much. Neil thinks Sam’s transformation is “phenomenal” but doesn’t list specifics.
Dr. Laura Logan is visiting Trey and Vanessa because she heard they had a disagreement. Umm, excuse me Dr. Laura, I’m not an “expert” but David and Ashley are having the mother of all disagreements. I think your time would be better spent with them. In fact, call the entire team, stat. In any event, Tres and Vanessa relive their “he pissed on the ideology of love” for Dr. Laura. She assigns homework: do something romantic and surprise each other with it.
Next, Dr. Laura is spreading her magic with Neil and Sam. Now, I agree they need her help, but why oh why isn’t she helping David and Ashley? Perhaps the experts have already written the couple off like a gangrene leg you amputate to save the rest of the body. Who knows. Back to Sam and Neil, Dr. Laura is troubled that they still aren’t in their own place. She asks about intimacy. Neil advices they have upgraded their status from high-fives to brief-hugs. Any day now these two will be adding a pat on the back, they are growing so fast. Their homework is to find a home to do the work in.
At David and Ashley’s place there is no sign of Dr. Laura. Left to their own devices, David wants to talk it out with Ashley, but since she won’t talk, David wrote his thoughts down in a letter. Most girls I know would like this, but Ashley doesn’t. She is about as much fun as bathing a cat. Ashley tells David he doesn’t understand the magnitude of his actions. She wants nothing to do with him. He’s a liar. Go away and give her space. So, Greg agrees to give Ashley her space. For those of you who wanted Greg to point to the front door and say, “There’s your space, Ashley. Go get it,” I feel your disappointment.
We cut to Tres and Vanessa on the basketball court, and not a moment too soon. Ashley and David are sucking the joy out of reality life. As they dribble around, Vanessa is gracious in letting Tres be the star and Tres patiently coaches Vanessa on shooting baskets. They are a great team. Vanessa asks Tres about his most fav moment in basketball as a kid. Flash forward to Sam’s place, she and Neil are searching online for a new place to live where Neil won’t feel like a guest. They agree on a house and pull the trigger on a place for just the two of them.
Back over at the depressing dungeon, David is packing for Buffalo to visit with his family and give Ashley her space. He goes to say good bye and is met with a cold response from Ashley who’s in bed with her dog, informing David that his “text girl” said she didn’t even know who he was until he friended her. So there. Have a nice flight. Interesting that Ashley will talk to a relevant stranger about her marriage, but not to her husband, another relevant stranger, about her marriage. Things that make you go hmm.
Since his wife is under the weather, Tres brings home medicine, sushi and flowers. What a guy. Vanessa is starting a new job and hopes this one will allow her a better work/life balance. The couple hangs their guitar painting from date- night sideways in the hall. Tres gets all philosophical and says they are just like the painting – rough in the beginning, but soon to be a masterpiece. Vanessa makes a mental note to discuss this the next time Dr. Laura stops by.
Ashley is home alone and loving life. She says that David’s letter is fake. Thankfully her friend, also named Ashley (but we’ll call her Ash) stops by to validate Ashley’s side of the story and that she is right and David is wrong. Ashley explains how innocent she is and how evil David is. But she notices something interesting, if she hurts, it must mean Ashley actually feels something other than disdain for Greg. Aww, look, the Tinman really does have a heart. Ash is worried for Ashley because she knows how hard she’s been trying. (Hello, she’s the only one who knows this.) Ashley says her needs are simple. She wants a man that doesn’t lie, offers mutual respect, and wants to be friends. Basically everything she’s got in David. Ashley and Ash’s hug it out and it’s the most intimacy we’ve seen Ashley give someone other than her dog.
David is in Buffalo, NY, sharing the story of #textgate with his younger brother. The wise, younger brother sees where the train went off the tracks by asking another woman out for drinks. David reveals he feels like a failure, something his brother wholeheartedly agrees with, and David’s optimism has been renewed. Family is weird like that.
It’s moving day, again, for Neil and Sam. But this house is different, it has a mezuzah and an owl mug. The universal signs that everything is going to be alright. Neil is happy to no longer be a guest, though technically they are both guests in this new home the producers the couple found. Neil feels a change in the air as the couple makes their bed together. He is ready to move once more, from the friend-zone to lovers-lane. Good luck with that, Neil.
Back with Treynessa, Vanessa surprises Tres with a basket o’ crap from the checkout line of Target. Candy, magazines, maybe some batteries, for their four week anniversary. Tres tells her it’s the nicest thing someone has ever done for him. Really? I thought Vanessa should have placed two tickets to the next Hawks game in the basket, really seal the deal, but a Men’s Health magazine and chocolate are just a nice, sort of.
Over at “Art and Soul” Sam and Neil are painting pottery. Neil was going to paint a wax burner, but with the threat of a vase smashed on his head, the couple decide to pain the vase instead. Neil is going to his cousin’s wedding in Vegas alone in a few days because Sam couldn’t get that Saturday off. She has a bank to run and loans to deny, people. She is very busy. During their painting session, Sam learns that Neil hates for anyone to touch his face. This came up when Sam tried to wipe the paint from her hands on Neil’s face.
David visits his dad at the cemetery and cries about the mess his marriage to a total stranger has become. I mean, who saw this coming? David is as lost today as the day his dad died. He is in deep pain and has an epiphany – just like when his dad died, which brought him pain – pain equals love. David calls Ashley from Buffalo to check in, but she doesn’t answer. No surprise there. He’s determined to fight for his marriage, even if he’s the only one. Back in Atlanta, Ashley says in a testimonial that she will give David a second chance, even if he doesn’t deserve it. Can you imagine her as a nurse? “I’ll give you the morphine since your leg is shattered, but keep in mind you don’t deserve this for getting hit by a car.”
The show ends with Tres and Vanessa celebrating her birthday with assorted desserts, card, cologne, and flowers Tres bought, but the real treat is a sneak peek at Tres’ upcoming book, Marriage Advice for Dummies. 1) Be very attentive. 2) Put forth the effort. 3) Bring home flowers. And that’s it for now. Perhaps a better title would be, Limited Marriage Advice for Dummies Who Marry at First Sight.
Tune in next week when the tension rises as decision day approaches. Tell us what you think. Can David and Ashley’s marriage be saved? Are Tres a Vanessa a shoe in? And are Sam and Neil the wildcard?